100 Seconds

100 seconds is what I asked her to spare over chat via the keys of my smart phone. I felt the urge to share some thoughts I had on the mind earlier and I was in a sharing mood. With the dramatic pauses included, I estimated it would take about that long.

I was keeping myself entertained during my lunch break because for one, the exchange had my interest and two, my food was lackluster at best. But that's what happens when I cook a meal that I had no intentions of eating that night, for the sole purpose of having it for next day's lunch. I mean, visually, it would have made your mouth water – and it must have because this is kind of the segue.

So, I was just sharing a feeling of mine over IM when a co-worker came into the lunch room. I rarely see her – anywhere in the building. Not in this room, not by the elevators, not in the lobby and not on this floor either – so naturally, I flashed her a smile as we exchanged the usual cordials.

"Hey, what's going on?"

"Nothing much. How are you?"

"I'm good. You?"

"I'm not bad. Welcome back."

[The laughter went here]

After the chuckles trail off, I return my attention to my phone and chat partner - but not before noticing how she took in the whole scene that was me, in one fluid eye movement. She took in the black slacks, the black shirt with gray pinstripes and the gray v-neck sweater as well. She concluded the scan at the black spectacles. Like I said, fluid.

When precisely, she took inventory of my meal, however, is beyond me. In between conversation with her girlfriend, she made a trip to the microwave, a trip to the ice machine and somewhere else in addition to that. I only knew the extent of her observance when I got up to throw out the under-seasoned food that she asked if I cooked myself.

"Yeah, I did. If I don't cook, I don't eat."

She laughs in a nature that I've witnessed before so I didn't notice that I was either auditioning, interviewing or filling out an application. For what job? I wasn't sure. The next question was in regards to breakfast and whether or not I ate it once I got to work. I answered that as well – oblivious. Meanwhile, my phone is on the table, next to my newspaper, fork and napkin. Every line my IM buddy sends me after reading my thoughtful words, causes my phone to vibrate. I can hear it. I want to get back to it but I apparently wasn't through with my verbal paperwork.

Then it happened.

The most blatant sign snapped me out of my trance. It happened so fast but played in slo-mo. She was flying through a barrage of questions and somehow worked it over to working out and what gym I went to – when she threw me a look that I may not always get but I'd most certainly never forget.

I was standing there adjusting my sweater when, as if she was waiting for any hand movement in the vicinity of my waistband to take place, she puts my nether region right in her sites. It lasted an instant but it was too long to add the word brief before it.

I didn't see it coming but I definitely saw me going. I realized that maybe it was that season and I needed a refresher course on survival skills. Either way, a retreat was in order. So I back step while concluding the conversation, get back to the table, grab my phone, pack my container up, fold my paper and exit stage right, never passing go. I reply to the lines awaiting me on the screen, before I get on the elevator to return to my floor and back to my desk. My lunchtime chat friend doesn't make mention of my absence because ironically, I was only gone for 100 seconds.